Why is there Homosexuality in America?

The church has bought into the modern idea that men and women are equal and interchangeable. Homosexuality follows logically from this: if men and women can do the work of a man or woman, a man can do the work of a wife and marry a man! There is a strange blind spot here and we need to address it.

My Statement on Charlottesville

My statement regarding the recent political violence in Charlottesville. Just in case I end up in yet another pointless conversation on the topic, so that I can direct people to my statement. Part I: Finnish Perspectives I come from outside the American political discourse, from Finland - one of the most racially homogeneous countries in the world, where we take pride in judging people ONLY by their merits, not their skin color or bloodline. We are a nation of peasants with almost no trace of class society. However, I do realize that racism of a sorts is a part of my life as well. Let me explain. When I meet a Russian, I really have to apply Luke 6:28 and pray for the person I meet so as to be in the love of God towards a person that to me represents centuries of unprovoked attacks, enslavement and a superior attitude towards my people. In the 18th century, Russians took tens of thousands of Finns slave (from a nation of 400,000), and this was just one of the woes our people endured from them. War followed war, followed by sporadic raids in between. For centuries. Later there were more positive developments, which ended in our nation's independence, only to be followed by an unprovoked attack by Soviet Russia on our independent nation in 1939, for which the USSR was thrown out of the League of Nations. It is only 75 years since that war, and the scars are still there. On the other hand, our people never had slaves. Certainly no black slaves. As a child, I never saw a black person until when our family traveled abroad. And mostly these people were part of the same church and very pleasant to be with. fear of strangers is a natural response (and we all have it), but that always gave way to friendship and appreciation when you find how nice the other person is. It is nowadays easy to forget there was racism and classes among white people, even to pretend there was no such thing. The middle ages are over, along with the feudal system, slavery (of white people) and class society. In Finland, all men and women have had voting rights since 1906 but not before that! Similar stories can be told of many European countries: white men have not had voting right for all eternity and class has defined destinies of white people for a long time. I can say I understand racism on the side of the victim: the combination of fear and resentment towards people that represent the abuse of my people. And I've also found a solution to it: the love of God that covers many sins, and the realization that I will be judged one day for ONLY my own actions, not those of others. No amount of empty words in media will help. And ultimately my and my nation's destiny is in our own hands. A narrative and mentality of victimhood and bitterness will only rob us of the better future that is ahead of us. Part II: America Much of the racial and other political issues in America are incredibly divided. When talking about political issues, I often get (and have learned to dread) the question "where do you get your news from?" This is a question I've never heard outside the USA and to me it epitomizes what is wrong about the highly divided political discussion here: very few care about the facts, but decide their (highly emotional) response based on who is reporting. In other words,its a question of taking sides. I've made a point of cross-referencing the news sources of the two bickering sides. A piece of news that is harmful to the right, I take from Fox. A piece of news that is damning to the left, I take from the NY times. Confused faces and hilarity ensues :-) But the point is, facts don't have a political affiliation. Facts don't take sides. They are the same no matter where you read them from. And 99% of the time, that is how I find them to be represented in media, although I probably read news differently from the typical American. We are all responsible for making a real effort to understand the absolute facts outside of partisan considerations. Part III: Charlottesville Charlottesville represents to me a seed of discord sown into the nation, around which thousands upon thousands of harmful and divisive conversations build up like a giant snowball that didn't have to happen, is made up of harmless water, but which has built up momentum and crushes all in its path. Once that snowball melts, we can find a tiny tiny spec of dust inside that will make us all ashamed of how big we made this to be. I wish! I can almost hear the next snowball rumbling towards us as we speak. Another round of finger-pointing, renouncing, taking sides and unfriending on Facebook is just around the corner. Part IV: The Church So is there any shelter from this bombardment? Is there any solid ground we can stand on and still remain standing after the (yet another) storm has passed? Yes: the Word of God. "You shall not -- curse a ruler of your people." (Exodus 22:28) "-- Fear God. Honor the emperor." (1 Peter 2: 17) The point: there are some boundaries to how you should talk about the leader of your nation. Leave the president out if unsure, and do not judge him. And it doesn't matter if its a D or a R sitting in the White House. In particular, there is no need to accuse the president of racism, especially when he hasn't said anything racist. And he hasn't. Another principle enforces this: "He who diligently seeks good seeks favor, but evil comes to him who searches for it." (Prov 11:27). In other words: try to find the good in every person and situation, instead of all the evil (and suspected evil). If we keep blowing every evil thing out of proportion, that is what we'll end up with. "If possible, so far as it depends upon you, live peaceably with all." (Romans 12:18) "-- You shall love your neighbor as yourself." (Romans 13:9) "Judge not, that you be not judged. For with the judgment you pronounce you will be judged, and the measure you give will be the measure you get." (Matthew 7:1-2) Meaning: do not judge people. Perhaps judge actions, words and policies if needed, but not people! If someone asks you to judge another person, remind them of this verse. A good perspective on this comes from seniour IHOPKC leader Stuart Greaves, who reminded us of a certain young nationalist, who made murderous threats in his religiosity and zeal, but later became known as Paul the apostle.We shouldn't condemn a person to forever be in a certain mold, but free them from such curses. In the bible, Joshua asked the angel whether he was on the enemy's side or his side. The answer was: "No; but I am the commander of the army of the Lord." (Joshua 5:14). Perhaps this is a clue how God feels about our political bickering. Part V: In Conclusion My feeling is that everyone is left hurt and worse off after this whole ordeal. Old fears, resentment and bitterness has erupted among the black population. A sense of shame and (mostly wrongful) sense of guilt has washed over the white population. Everyone is eyeing everyone else with suspicion. Many whites have risen up to state various versions of "thank God I'm not like those sinners", which only reminds me of the pharisee's prayer in Luke 18:11. People crying, fearful, divided and angry left and right. So when someone asks you whose side of THIS you are... your answer should be the same as that angel's: no.

Charlottesville Events and how the Church Reacts

There has been a heated debate ever since David Duke and his group went marching, clashed with Antifa counter-protesters, and people were even killed. Background story: https://www.nytimes.com/2017/08/12/us/charlottesville-protest-white-nationalist.html Now, to be clear, when people that call themselves "Christian" go out in support of racism and perhaps even slavery, the Church needs to say this is not who we are. However, that has already been done many times and there is no reason to assume that that position has changed. This country currently in the grips of political division unlike at any other time, and part of the reason is this sentiment that you are either "for us or against us". In other words, you must _fully_ support our cause, and view the world from our point of view, or else you are part of the problem. I hear words like complicit, tacit approval, silence is to condone, etc. With this mentality, its easy to start going after people, for example Donald Trump. You may start with a request to denounce. If that denounciation is not in the "correct" format, or comes too slowly, you may demand additional acts of penitence. Finally, only established members of the "righteous" club can decide when a person has repented, denounced, condemned or rejected strongly enough and correctly whatever is the issue. This tactic will backfire. First of all its manipulative and subjective and has nothing to do with a person's real beliefs and actions, and everything to do with a person's desire to appear good in the public eye. History knows many evil people, who have vocally decried and judged the very things they secretly do. The solution from the church needs to start with the simple but hard realization that God is not left or right, but up. Even Joshua, the leader of the ancient people of Israel got this answer when asking if the angel was for him or against him: "No; but as commander of the army of the Lord I have now come" (Joshua 5:14). Likewise, God's solutions to slavery, racism and now the traumas and divisions in society are not of this world. The church needs to take note. Our job is not to become the most vocal advocates of the civil rights movement, but rather to present a real solution to real individuals seeking elevation from bondage. To my black brothers I suggest the following: forgive, then turn to God for answers on how to go forward in life. Go to church and ask them. If they are racists, you can find another church. But in any case, God is your salvation, not man nor man-made movements.

Overcoming Anger

I'm ashamed to admit it. I've had have anger issues. On a brighter note, the Lord has started to deal with my anger issues. He told me that the root of anger is insecurity. Insecurity leads to the pursuit of security through control, which is the gateway to anger. God also told me that in His kingdom security is obtained not through control, but through power of influence. He simply makes the world safe. He doesn't threaten to sit on it if it doesn't change, He changes it in His own time and way. I need to start trusting God on this. He is my security and His way of security is influence. He will influence my circumstances. He will stand up for me. He will make the very areas of my life where I've experienced and expected evil to be made good again. All I need is to forgive and trust.

Forgiveness

If you want to experience God's grace, find someone you need to forgive. -me

Slow to Anger

The Lord passed before him and proclaimed, “The Lord, the Lord, a God merciful and gracious, slow to anger, and abounding in steadfastflove and faithfulness (Exodus 34:6)

I've often thought of why God is "slow to anger", and have actually felt it would be better if he were to get angry fast so that we can the faster know His displeasure and correct our ways. But I have recently had some revelation on this issue.

God gives us time to use the opportunities He gives us. He gives us an instruction, such as to end doing some sinful thing, and then He gives us _time_ to get acquainted with the thought and do it.

God wants us to succeed in life and in following Him, so He patiently waits for us to learn the lesson He has taught us, then gives us time to recuperate before giving another instruction.

How to have a good sex life

Openness, Acceptance and Love - how to have a good sex life

We need to feel loved. In marriage we also need to feel and know that we are not going to be rejected. This is at the very core of the marriage experience: to feel safe without the fear of being rejected. Rejection is the greatest fear that man has.

Imagine a man saying to her wife that he wants to try anal sex with her, and her responding with "don't you dare say that or I'll divorce you!". In this example she is really saying three things: her body does not belong to her (thus violating 1Cor 7:4 [1]), that she is rejecting him on a certain level and is prepared to reject him on an even deeper level (violating Mal 2:16) and finally that she is not under his leadership, but rather decides for her self (violating Ephesians 5:22 [2]).

The key to a happy marriage and happy marital sex is to allow ANYTHING to be openly discussed without the fear or ridicule or rejection. You should consider your spouse's thoughts to be your own: if she says she wants oral sex, imagine it was you having that thought. Or if he mentions oral sex or anal sex, imagine they are your thoughts. How would you react if you had an idea like that: you would probably research the topic and feed your curiosity, perhaps coming to a point where you want to try something like that.

Now the point is not "trying it out", but that you can freely express your thoughts and feelings with your partner. My experience has been that after years of learning to freely talk with my spouse about sexual fantasies and trying out many things with her, I can have regular vaginal sex with nothing kinky going on, knowing that if I DID ask for those things, it would not be  a problem: I have established that I will not experience rejection in this relationship.

A man will probably want to try scandalous things like anal sex, for the purpose of finding out if she is really his wife and that her body really belongs to him as in [1]. Once it has been tested and tried, he will be content and will most likely not want to constantly do it again. At least this was the case with me.

Over the years I have become fully confident that there is no thought in this area that I can't express to my wife without fear of rejection. That does not mean that everything needs to be tried, but it does mean that you two are on the same team, tackling life's questions together, not as competitors in holding everything back.

Married couples are not supposed to hold back from each other: you are supposed to share your previous sexual history (which unfortunately most of us have to one degree or another), share your passing sexual fantasies etc.

My experience has also been that the special protection of God causes everything that is disclosed within marriage to lose its wrong hold on you. For example: I was interested in porn and would sometimes watch it. I showed my wife the things in porn that I find exciting, and suddenly it stopped having the same power over me. That area of my sexuality became OUR common knowledge and thus another part of my sexuality was brought inside the marriage rather than staying outside it. And God does the rest, believe me.

There is a very special and powerful protection in marriage. Anything that you do within marriage that isn't good for you, will lose its power and will start to feel silly and unneeded. We actually tried to have sex with porn playing, but I lost my erection, which was totally unheard of! Usually when watching porn I would have super strong erections and orgasms, and with my wife too. I hopefully don't have to tell you that lustfully looking at another person is wrong, but this is the most extreme example of how I've seen God's protection working in my life.

Now don't take the above as a license for sin (don't continue watching porn), but please do tell your spouse all about your porn obsession, and the specifics of what in porn turns you on. It will bring you two closer to each other and will let her learn more about you. And same goes the other way around of course.

[1] 1Cor 7:3 ESV For the wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. Likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does.

[2] Eph 5:22 ESV Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands.

[3] Mal 2:16 KJV  For the Lord, the God of Israel, saith that he hateth putting away: for one covereth violence with his garment, saith the Lord of hosts: therefore take heed to your spirit, that ye deal not treacherously.